Over the past few weeks, politics have crescendoed in a deafening cacophony, thanks to a bunch of tone deaf partisans who love nothing more than the sound of their own voices.
In effort to save what’s left of your sanity, we’re going to present you with a simplified summary of what you may have missed.
Alabama held a runoff republican primary on Tuesday, for a special election.
Jeff Sessions vacated his spot in the senate when he became Attorney General.
Luther Strange was temporarily appointed by the Governor who has since left office under a cloud of disgrace.
It makes for a fine bathroom read, so we’ve included an article on the ordeal for those of you who’ve been eating your fiber.
(click on image to read)
The challenger was a popular judge named Roy Moore.
Both are conservative and both ran on their support of the Trump agenda.
Things got weird when the administration went all in for Strange and the Bannon brigade doubled down on Moore.
The President and the Vice President made an enormous show of support for Strange. Then Bannon and friends flew down to Alabama to top it.
While purporting to be working to support the president, prominent conservatives who are no longer in favor, smeared Strange as a political hack under Mitch McConnell’s thumb.
It was one of the most bizarre political races of no real import in some time.
The idea that the Steve Bannon crew was doing anything other than undermining the president is preposterous. The message was loud and clear.
Trump doesn’t know how to help himself, so we are here to save him. It was insulting and sleazy.
In point of fact, Moore who won by about 10 points on Tuesday night has made himself abundantly clear.
He will support the president when it suits him. His primary loyalty is to an extreme far right agenda that will never fly with moderate republicans.
At one point, for example, he fought to criminalize homosexual intimacy.
Whatever Steve Bannon is up to, it isn’t an attempt to support the president.
Rumor has it that on the heels of this victory, the Breitbart circle of friends is hoping to primary a significant number of more moderate republicans with ideological purists.
Not only will they not support the Trump agenda, they will send vast numbers of independent voters into a panic.
Much of the president’s support came from voters who object to leftist extremism. It would be a gross miscalculation to assume that those voters would be amenable to similar insanity from the right.
The proposed Graham Cassidy healthcare plan failed.
Rand Paul didn’t view it as a clean repeal. He was always a no vote. He’s a pesky little so and so but at least he’s been consistent.
Ted Cruz wanted the other birdies to coo and praise him as he molted. He was willing to vote yes but only if he received adequate recognition. Much like Hillary, he still doesn’t understand why voters dislike him.
Susan Collins is simply intolerable. She played a protracted game of will she or won’t she and milked every minute of it for camera time.
For her next performance, perhaps she could star in an indy remake of Misery. That role would suit her.
John McCain is terribly ill, therefore we will resist the urge to suggest that he has behaved like a petulant, attention seeking brat in need of some time in the corner.
Trump rolled out the basics. It’s a bit light on details at the moment but republicans seem to be cautiously optimistic. They’re still stinging from the healthcare debacle.
Democrats have naturally been reaching for those tear soaked hankies that they love to waft around whenever the republicans suggest anything.
Schumer couldn’t wait to take to the stage to perform his standard Penelope Pitstop victim routine.
Frankly, when taken with a dose of humor and a stiff drink, his dewy eyed “I’m so scared” show can be almost fun to watch.
This plan is going to need to be fleshed out in greater detail before it can come to a vote. The good news is that the market responded positively.
The NFL grandstanding… oops kneeling.
This one isn’t going away anytime soon. The Dems are desperate to turn it into a racial chasm and the GOP is fed up.
Direct TVis reimbursing customers who no longer want to pay to watch their NFL football packages and democrats are shrieking about impeachment.
Hillary is hovering around like a malaria ridden tsetse fly hoping to swoop in to the Oval Office as soon as her minions do her bidding and oust Trump for once and for all.
There you have it.
Those are the highlights.
Thankfully, the new fall television lineup is upon us.